Tuesday, February 20, 2007
The Yo! Blair De-Surge
By John W. Lillpop
Just as President Bush is about to hurdle humankind's most successful democracy into a precarious constitutional crisis with his troop "surge," the president's main man in Iraq--Yo! Blair-- as Bush fondly calls him, is set to announce the withdrawal of British soldiers.
The Blair De-surge, if you will.
Far from being despondent over Blair's de-surge, Bush showed dramatic improvement in his snake oil selling skills by applauding the de-surge as a "sign of success" in Iraq.
Asked by our intrepid investigative snoop to explain why more Americans are needed in Iraq while Britain is going in the opposite direction, a senior White House aide commented as follows:
"The president was very impressed by the success acheived by those 3,000 British soldiers. By his reckoning, 21,000 more Americans on the ground should yield a seven-fold increase over the success realized by Blair and crew.
"In fact, Bush believes that with 21,000 more men and women, he can convert the vast majority of Iraqis to Christianity, including baptism, by Labor Day. The president believes that this could save his legacy by ramming his approval rating to around 30 percent by the end of his term."
This line of reasoning is somewhat akin to the president's call for "less pressure" on America's borders to stop the illegal invasion from Mexico which has seen 12-30 million third-world peasants dumped onto the backs of U.S. taxpayers.
Headless optimism is apparently running rampant in the Oval Office these days.
John Lillpop is a recovering liberal, "clean and sober" since 1992 when last he voted for a Democrat. Pray for John: He lives in the San Francisco Bay Area, where people like Nancy Pelosi are considered reasonable!